Renewed Mind – Part 4 – God-Given Emotions

Our soul – our thoughts, choices and emotions – is a vital part of who we are as human beings. Ignoring our soul only stunts our growth both in our soul and in our spirit.

A need for attention, dependence on others, and fear of being alone are results of abandonment issues from our childhood. Destructive acts, pouting, self-centeredness and temper tantrums all stem from deep deprivation and anger from our past.

Our lack of self-awareness and failure to accept our emotions will compound our past wounds, which we carry with us every day of our life, some of them since conception.

Our relationships suffer due to emotional, behavioral and mental deficits. Psychologically, we are stuck in the unresolved issues of our past, which prevent us from experiencing adulthood with a mature attitude.

We fail to succeed in most of our endeavors due to the lack of adult persistence, self-control and planning. Some of us are consumed with anger and unforgiveness, which we internalize.

This results in depression for which we take medication. This simply masks the pain in our soul and causes more grief as well as physical ailments such as headaches, and stomach and breathing and heart related issues.

If we allow our self to feel our anger, we can work through it to the grief buried within our subconscious mind (Ephesians 4:26). We can journal our thoughts and feelings, and ask God to help us to find the root cause of our grief and other negative emotions.

Never apologize for your emotions. God gave them to us. They are either a sign of sickness in our soul, a precaution to keep us safe, and an expression of the joy He places in the heart of His children (Proverbs 16:32, 17:22, 19:8; Ephesians 4:26-27).

After we identify the source of our negative emotions, we can grieve our losses and affirm and validate our feelings. Then we pray for God’s wisdom and healing, we forgive the perpetrators, who wounded us and caused our grief; and we move into the freedom and rest of the Lord Jesus Christ (Hebrews 13:5; John 8:36).

Prayer:
Father God, there are few of us on this earth who did not experience some form of abuse in our lifetime. We never learned to handle our emotions and often sin because of them. We may minimize, disassociate from or magnify our feelings; but teach us to learn from them, and to bring them to You for understanding and healing.

Help us to stop blaming our self for the abuse we suffered; to release the pent up energy from our negative emotions without sinning against You or someone else; and to allow our self to cry and grieve our losses. Then we can release the incident to You and find Your forgiveness for those who wounded us.

Thought for the Day:
God and Christ both gave us clear examples of how emotions are a normal and healthy part of life.

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Renewed Mind – Part 1 – A Wounded Soul

We often criticize people who are self-centered or who are touchy, angry or combative. We do not realize that they are simply trying to survive.

They are wounded and attempting to protect their soul from more pain. They will hurt us before we get the chance to hurt them; even if we have no intention nor desire to harm them.

If our words, tone or behavior even hint at aggression, they will attack us with vehemence and even violence. A teenager at the children’s home were we lived and worked interpreted my behavior this way.

She ended up pushing me out the van door backwards where I landed on my head on the pavement. I blacked out and revived with dizziness and a pounding headache; so they rushed me to the emergency room.

I survived the ordeal, but I often wonder if she did. They put her in the time-out room and quickly moved her out of our home; so we lost track of her. Her lifetime of abuse caused her to abuse me.

Another reason we over-react is that our soul is governed by sin (Romans 7:20-23). We miss the mark of God’s holiness and fall into unregenerate behavior (Romans 8:29). Satan uses this tendency for his purposes.

Our only hope for freedom from emotional wounds and the penchant of our flesh to sin is the saving power of Jesus Christ. His Holy Spirit transforms our spirit and soul through regeneration and sanctification (Titus 3:5). Trust in Him today.

Prayer:
Father God, we look forward to Christ’s return when You shall put everything under His feet. He will rule and reign over the earth for eternity from the throne in Jerusalem of His ancestor, King David (2 Samuel 7; Luke 1:32-33, 2:11). Israel will finally rejoice in the coming of their King Jesus (Matthew 24:8; Romans 11:1-2, 26; Isaiah 66:8; Ezekiel 37).

You will even put Satan away for eternity, wrapped in chains in hell (Revelations 20:2). We look forward to this new age. Peace and prosperity will fill the earth and all nations shall dwell together in unity and righteousness (Micah 4:1-7; Isaiah 42:1-4). There will be no crying there, and all emotional and physical sickness shall be healed (Isaiah 51:11).

Thought for the Day:
Only God can truly restore and comfort our soul (Psalm 23:3; 2 Corinthians 1:3); then He allows us to use this same comfort to help others who are in any affliction (2 Corinthians 1:4-5).
We often criticize people who are self-centered or who are touchy, angry or combative. We do not realize that they are simply trying to survive.

They are wounded and attempting to protect their soul from more pain. They will hurt us before we get the chance to hurt them; even if we have no intention nor desire to harm them.

If our words, tone or behavior even hint at aggression, they will attack us with vehemence and even violence. A teenager at the children’s home were we lived and worked interpreted my behavior this way.

She ended up pushing me out the van door backwards where I landed on my head on the pavement. I blacked out and revived with dizziness and a pounding headache; so they rushed me to the emergency room.

I survived the ordeal, but I often wonder if she did. They put her in the time-out room and quickly moved her out of our home; so we lost track of her. Her lifetime of abuse caused her to abuse me.

Another reason we over-react is that our soul is governed by sin (Romans 7:20-23). We miss the mark of God’s holiness and fall into unregenerate behavior (Romans 8:29). Satan uses this tendency for his purposes.

Our only hope for freedom from emotional wounds and the penchant of our flesh to sin is the saving power of Jesus Christ. His Holy Spirit transforms our spirit and soul through regeneration and sanctification (Titus 3:5). Trust in Him today.

Prayer:
Father God, we look forward to Christ’s return when You shall put everything under His feet. He will rule and reign over the earth for eternity from the throne in Jerusalem of His ancestor, King David (2 Samuel 7; Luke 1:32-33, 2:11). Israel will finally rejoice in the coming of their King Jesus (Matthew 24:8; Romans 11:1-2, 26; Isaiah 66:8; Ezekiel 37).

You will even put Satan away for eternity, wrapped in chains in hell (Revelations 20:2). We look forward to this new age. Peace and prosperity will fill the earth and all nations shall dwell together in unity and righteousness (Micah 4:1-7; Isaiah 42:1-4). There will be no crying there, and all emotional and physical sickness shall be healed (Isaiah 51:11).

Thought for the Day:
Only God can truly restore and comfort our soul (Psalm 23:3; 2 Corinthians 1:3); then He allows us to use this same comfort to help others who are in any affliction (2 Corinthians 1:4-5).

Overcoming Life’s Hurdles

Mental, emotional and physical pain and stress, loss and grief, and wounded individuals put us at risk for reaping negative results in life. In addition, unresolved childhood trauma increases the effects of our current distress. ( http://www.theophostic.com )

With repeated trauma, we can even develop various degrees of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and we view the world as a painful, alarming, treacherous place.

Separation through death, divorce, rejection, abandonment, etc. will affect our future relationships. We lose our sense of safety and security and may even live in continual fear and insecurity.

Our breathing is shallow, which affects our lungs, diaphragm and heart. Stomach, heart, lung and nerve issues cause us problems. Our mind can even affect us with physical symptoms, which have no physical source.

On guard in every situation, we are in a constant state of “fight or flight”. This makes us combative and easily angered when we feel vulnerable and helpless.

A lack of trust causes us to build thick walls around our soul. Then we feel lonely, disheartened, hopeless and overwhelmed. We may even blame our self for what happens to us.

Attempting to prepare our self for the unexpected, we delve into worse case scenarios to prepare our self for any contingency; yet, we only provide our self with a false sense of power and protection from future trauma.

When events in our life are going well, we tend to rely less on God and more on our self. We have the idea that we deserve God’s love and blessings, because we are so good.

However, with this attitude, we will never feel totally secure in life. We will live in constant anxiety, because we fear that if we fail in some area, we will lose His love and be lost for eternity.

The opposite is actually true. God loved us while we were still sinners, is our everlasting Savior and continues to love us unconditionally (Romans 5:8; 1 John 1:9). He is the same yesterday, today and for eternity (Hebrews 13:8).

Prayer:
Father God, thank You for allowing us to fail and to learn from our mistakes, to suffer trails for Your glory so that people can see our love for and trust in You regardless of our earthly status. Teach us to rely totally on You and not to pursue the world or the flesh.

Remind us to stop depending on our self and to begin to depend solely on You for every step we take (Proverbs 3:5-6). Help us to do only the works, which You ordained for us to achieve, rather than asking You to bless our works (Ephesians 2:10).

Thought for the Day:
When we rely on God’s Holy Spirit for direction and strength, we listen to God’s Spirit, step out in faith, and find all the resources we need to achieve all that God ordained us to do.
– Philippians 2:12-13, 4:13; Matthew 7:7-8

Joy Comes in the Morning

At any given moment of the day, when we least expect it, circumstances arise that cause fear and despair to darken our attitude. Heaviness shrouds our spirit and joy flees in retreat. Other people are making decisions, which adversely affect our life.

They ignore our wishes and do not consult our opinion first. They drag us through the negative consequences of their decisions. Eventually anger may arise to shield us from imminent suffering, and we explode and strike out at those causing the issues.

It seems to them that we are reacting with severe sharpness at some small offense, and this leaves them wounded and resentful.

We are only attempting to restore order to our life; but our soul pours forth a storm of accusations, which drench the recipient to the point of drowning. Then we feel guilty for over-reacting.

Our anxiety and depression deepen and we withdraw into a stoic abyss, shutting our self off from life. Our heart is full of anguish and fear, and we feel horrible and overwhelmed.

We wish we could fly away with the wings of a dove and be at rest. We would gladly stay in a desert, if it was far enough away from the torment we currently feel. We cry out for shelter from the tempest of disappointments (Psalm 55:4-6).

The good news is that our Lord is our Shepherd. He provides all of our needs and shelters us from every storm. He walks with us, even through the valleys of the shadow of death.

We can trust God to restore our soul and help us to bring order back to our life. He will heal our wounded soul with His love, joy and peace (Psalm 23, 30:5).

Prayer:
Father God, You lead us to fountains of living water and You dry all of our tears (Revelation 7:17). Now, teach us to get along with difficult people who make a mess of our life, and then condemn us, because we get upset with them.

They act like we are the ones at fault, and they blame us for all of their problems. We cannot dwell in unity with this type of person, unless You come to our rescue. We ardently trust You to work out even these alarming situations for our ultimate good (Romans 8:28).

Thought for the Day:
As we dwell in the secret place of the Most High, He will lead us, guide us and make all things work out for our good. – Psalm 91

Healing Relationships – Part 2

Due to the insecurity and fear in life, many of us attempt to control people and events in order to maintain a safe and secure existence. Unfortunately, life never cooperates.

People who are wounded in their soul form relationships with other wounded people. In fact, we are all wounded to some extent or another due to our life experiences.

When we are wounded, we often choose untrustworthy people to trust, unreliable people to rely upon, and emotionally unavailable people from which we attempt to receive love. We end up more wounded than ever before.

If we are already in such a marriage relationship, God does not want us to divorce (Malachi 2:16). He will change us, which will also help to change our mate. The transition is gradual and it will take patience and time.

If you are not already married, then practice spiritual discernment and seek only God’s will for your future mate (Psalm 37:34).

Trust God to lead you to His selection for your mate. Walk in serenity and realize that when God wants you to be married, He will supply a mate.

As we learned from the Serenity prayer in Part 1 of Healing Relationships, we can only find fulfillment as we focus on eternal aspects of life and walk in God’s Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23).

This changes our belief system, our choices and our pattern of behavior.

Prayer:
Father God, thank You for healing the wounds of our past as You sanctify our soul and make us whole. Help us to focus on eternal matters in life and to put the matters of our soul in Your capable hands.

You will bring us everything that we need in life when we need it. If we do not have what we want, we can be assured that it is not Your time for us to have it.

If it is not Your will for us to have the desires of our heart, then you will change our desires to line up according to Your Will. Help us to wait patiently on You (Psalm 37:7, 40:11).

Thought for the Day:
Securing counseling as a couple will teach each partner how to live in a healthy, interdependent relationship; this way, you will grow together instead of apart.
*For healing the wounds of our past, start by reading my post: http://fulfilledchristianlife.blogspot.com/2012/08/part-1-healing-emotional-wounds.html

Christ, our Solid Rock

The power of prayer girding every circumstance in our life is laid on a foundation of the solid Rock of Christ and His sacrifice in our life. This solid bedrock supports us with both positive and negative experiences from our past. God used these incidents in our life to add to the emotional and mental framework of the house the Lord is building in our life.

Negative emotions are worm-riddled planks, which give our house an insecure structure. God replaces that rotting wood with His Truth about a situation. He may not use a Bible verse, but He will speak an impression in our spirit that is biblical and that we know is from Him. We renounce Satan’s lies about this issue and renew our mind with God’s Truth.

This frees us to forgive any person who harmed or wounded us in any way. The negative emotions, which plague us – especially people with a melancholy personality, are slowly replaced with thoughts that are factual, gracious, accurate, holy, divine, admirable and commendable. We focus on what we know is true about Christ in us, and His life in other Christians.

Then the peace of God will fill every corner of the new house, which God is building with our life (Philippians 4:7-9; 2 Corinthians 5:17). These new planks, these strong and solid Truths, add to our firm foundation of prayer and God’s presence in our life. Focusing on the Truths of God’s Word calms our fears, builds up our confidence in Christ within us (Colossians 1:27, 3:1-4; Galatians 2:20), and releases His power in our thoughts, words and deeds.

Prayer:
Father God, with our eyes focused solely on You and Your Word, we realize that regardless of the battles we experience in our world, You already overcame them all through the blood of Christ. You are working out everything, even negative circumstances, for our ultimate good (Romans 8:28). Help us to rely on You, rather than in worldly wisdom and strength, to fight our battles. For You are our mighty stronghold (Psalm 18:2). Remind us that Jesus is our firm foundation and nothing and no one can shake us out of Your hand (Romans 8:35-39). Regardless of the negative activity around us, we remain peaceful and calm within, with trust and hope in You alone (Psalm 62:5; Isaiah 26:3).

Thought for the Day:
Do not be afraid or discouraged by the negative activity and thoughts in your life, no matter how overwhelming they are; because there is greater power in us through Christ, who helps us to fight our battles, than the power of the flesh, the world or the devil combined. – 2 Chronicles 32:7-8

For help with a wounded past go to:
( http://www.theophostic.com )

God Hates Divorce

God takes divorce and infidelity personally, especially if the other person is faithful to his or her vows. The Lord made it very clear that He will not accept the worship of a person who makes a vow to their husband or wife and then is unfaithful to their partner. God wants couples to remain loyal to one another (Hebrews 13:4-7).

In today’s world, divorce is considered a convenience, especially if one or the other party is unhappy. We call evil good and believe that God is fine with it, but He is not. In marriage, God makes two people one flesh in body and soul (Genesis 2:22-24; Matthew 19:4-6). He desires godly children from this union. He considers divorce as an act of overwhelming cruelty. That is why God hates divorce.

When we reject the Word of the Lord, we lose our credibility. We are no longer wise, but foolish. When a person is unfaithful to the Lord, God will sometimes take their mate from them and give their mate and their possessions to someone else. Then the cruel and unloving mate will be cast down from the Lord’s favor (Malachi 2:14-17; Jeremiah 8:8-12)

God desires for us to choose to be fulfilled with our mate, and to let their good points make us happy. If we surround our mate with love, even if they are mean or inattentive, then God’s blessings will be on us (Proverbs 5:18-19). Most people do not just decide to be harsh or angry or neglectful for the fun of it! They are wounded individuals who need God’s healing (James 5:16 http://www.theophostic.com ).

Prayer:
Father God, teach wives to live in submission to their husband and teach husbands to gladly lay down their life for their wife, just like Jesus did for us. There is not a man alive that does not love his own body, so help him to love his wife just as he does himself. Help us to submit to one another out of respect for You. Remind us that we are complete in You, regardless of the circumstances in our marriage and in our life (Ephesians 5:21-22; Colossians 2:10).

Thought for the Day:
Every godly husband loves his wife as he loves himself and every authentic Christian wife will respect her husband. – Ephesians 5:23