Disposable People – Part 2 – Advantages of Staying Married

There are many advantages to staying together with our first love. The first benefit is for our children. The continuity of the family is a basic human need.

Children are encouraged that their own marriage will make it through the tough times, just like their parents did. Otherwise, they will develop a disposable mentality as well.

Staying married contributes to overall emotional, mental, spiritual, financial and physical health. It reduces the stress of starting over and the effects of grief, which divorce adds to our life.

Dating new people, while fun in some cases, is risky because everyone has baggage of some sort, visible and invisible. In a second marriage, we often spend more time with our spouse’s children than our own.

Therefore, do not get careless in your marriage; relax, but look, speak and act attractively for one another. Continue dating each other, even when the children come along. Enjoy your mate’s company.

When we and our spouse disagree, we can find a third alternative, on which we can both agree. If there is a seemingly unsolvable issue, get counseling to find an agreeable path.

We may need to take a break, to put a brief time or distance between each other in order to gain a new perspective on our relationship.

A separation for the purpose of reconciliation gives us a chance to talk about our disagreements with the freedom of having a safe place to go if tempers flare or we feel frustrated or unsafe.

We may find that we miss our spouse, the security they give to our life and little joys they bring to our everyday experiences, their laughter and support.

We can both agree to change habits which cause friction in our relationship. We can gain a better understanding of our spouse by talking intimately about each other’s honest feelings, needs and desires.

Forgiveness helps us to rekindle the love we once felt for each other. We will grow to admire, encourage, appreciate, cherish and serve one another all the days of our life, and we will stay together until death parts us.

Prayer:
Father God, remind us that our marriage vows were made to You as well as to our spouse. Prompt us to pray with our spouse, because You help us to resolve our issues. If we take turns praying, each partner praying one sentence at a time, this prevents much of the frustration of praying together. Teach us to pause and listen to You speak to us as we pray too.

Help us to bear one another’s burdens, to be long suffering with each other’s shortcomings, to encourage and build each other up and to enjoy one another’s company. Remind us why we fell in love in the first place and help us to keep the eternal flame of agape love burning.

Thought for the Day:
Love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins. – 1 Peter 4:8

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Spiritual Red Flags

Negative emotions are a red flag that something is wrong in our soul. It may be abuse from someone in our life, or society putting undue stress on us, or we may encounter an unsafe person or an experience, which causes anger to rise up in us. This happens to protect us from some perceived harm. We could also be reaping the results of our own fleshly pursuits. Negative emotions also arise when God’s will for us upsets us and reveals some idol in our life.

Our emotional red flags alert us to physical or emotional harm, erroneous beliefs, an ungodly goal or an area taking us away from God’s will. We may also feel discouraged, angry or upset because we are hungry, sleep deprived, ignored, away from the comfort of home, lonely, etc. Often a simple meal, a nap, gaining someone’s attention, meeting a new friend or going to the comfort of home will dispel these negative emotions.

If not, then get into a quiet place and reconnect with God’s Spirit, step out of your carnal, fleshly mindset and look for God’s miracle in the circumstances. When our negative emotions indicate an idol in our motives, thinking or aspirations, or reveal to us our negative spiritual attitude and focus, we can seek God’s Spirit to pluck these disturbing menaces from our soul. Once we are willing to work out our own salvation, God’s Spirit delivers us from our self (Philippians 2:12-13).

Prior to Salvation, we conformed to the image of this carnal, depraved world, but now God calls us to allow His Spirit to transform our mind and behavior and to make us holy, acceptable and perfect in God’s sight. He gives us His spirit of wisdom and revelation as we come to know Him more intimately. He enlightens our eyes to discern between various levels of evil and holiness, and to flee from evil.

By His death on Calvary’s cross, Jesus Christ set us free from the Law of Sin and Death by replacing it with the Law of the Spirit of Life in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:2). He removes all condemnation from us caused by our past sin and failings (Romans 8:1). He includes us in His family and makes us co-heirs with Jesus of all that He owns (Ephesians 2:19; Romans 8:17; Psalm 50:10). He calls us to imitate Him as His Beloved children (Ephesians 5:1).

Prayer:
Father God, we die to our self by denying our flesh in simple areas, such as that second piece of cake. Then we soon develop less of a desire for carnal appetites and attitudes, and more of a desire to live in submission to Your will. From this, we reap intimacy with You and have fewer areas in our life, on which the devil can feed (John 14:30). We start this walk of total dependence on You by developing quiet times in our daily schedule in order to sit in Your presence. Remind us to spend our day in praise for who You are and all that You do for us.

Thought for the Day:
As we humbly submit to God’s control over our life, He fills us with the power of His Spirit, such as was resident in the Apostles after Pentecost. – Acts 2:41