Let Me Tell You, Ladies

A man loves to be useful and to feel needed, admired, accepted as he is and appreciated. As his wife, we are his biggest fan and most vocal cheering section.

We encourage our husband, show him appreciation, leave love notes in his briefcase or lunchbox, get excited at his accomplishments and care about his day. We can ask him what he needs, and do all in our power to help.

Our husband is not our mule and a paycheck. His role in life is not to function as our servant. Even if we both work all day, and we share the chores and child care, he should choose the chores he feels comfortable doing.

When our husband has a day off, he needs some of that time for himself. Family time is important, but he needs some of that time to chill, to hang with his buds, to create in his shop, to surf the waves or the internet, or to play his gaming device.

He decompresses his stress this way and can pay more attention to the family during our time together. A date night is also important for us as a couple…a time to play, laugh, make memories, form a closer bond and do something fun.

If we make his favorite meals and have everything he needs for the next day in plain view and ready for him before we go to bed, his love for us will grow; and he will make more of an effort to care for our needs as well.

If he is withdrawn, irritable, angry, or exhibiting any negative emotions, we can give him some space and some time to work out his issues. We can ask if there is anything we can do to help, and then follow through with his requests.

When a disagreement occurs, we brainstorm and pray together rather than just caving in to our partner or fighting to get our own way. Once God shows us a scenario, which we both feel good about, we proceed with unity and joy in our heart.

Prayer:
Father God, Your Word warns us that all of the forces of hell, along with the temptations and disagreements of the world, unite to destroy our marriage. We often join them and make life more difficult for our partner.

Remind us that love never fails; so we can decide together that divorce is never an option, since divorce shreds our family and removes the support that our children need regardless of how old they are. Divorce makes Your Church vulnerable, unstable and defeated.

Revive us, O Lord, so that we can rejoice in You (Psalm 85:6). Satisfy us anew each new morning with your unfailing love, so we can sing for joy and rejoice all the days of our life (Psalm 90:14).

Thought for the Day:
There is nothing, which happens in a marriage that cannot be resolved, if both mates will prefer the other person, exhibit patience during a disagreement, join forces during a trial and spend time enjoying one another’s company.

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The Beauty of Marriage

Marriage was designed by God in order for a man and a woman to appreciate the advantages of each other’s company. The Bible is full of verses, which speak about the benefits of two people sharing life together; and when we add Christ into the equation, the three of us are not easily defeated (Genesis 2:18, 20; Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

When a man finds a wife, he opens up a whole world of benefits for himself and his future family (Proverbs 18:22). Like puzzle pieces, we learn to fit together perfectly and blend our two personalities to work as a team.

Our individual strengths help to overcome the weaknesses in one another. We never insist on our own way, but we talk out our issues until we find a third plan, on which we can both agree.

This prevents heated words, angry emotions and shredded feelings. If both members prefer one another over themselves, there is no issue in any relationship, which cannot be worked out.

Both partners must really listen to one another and take each other seriously. Even if the issue seems unimportant to us, it is important to our mate, so we should take it seriously.

This helps us not to over-react, because we know we are heard. It also allows us to gather all the facts before forming conclusions (Proverbs 18:13).

If we dwell together with understanding and prefer our mate over our self, then love grows (Peter 3:7). When we make God the priority in our marriage, and worship God and serve in a church together, our respect for one another increases.

Marriage also helps us to increase our wealth by either both working at different jobs, or by one staying home to frugally care for the house, children and family errands.

We build together rather than tearing each other down. Abiding by these principles tends to resolve many marital issues before they ever start, and we cherish and admire one another.

Prayer:
Father God remind us that in our marriage, we do not complete one another. Only Christ in us can truly complete us (Colossians 2:10). Neither do we compete with one another. Instead, we complement each other. We provide wisdom in decisions, companionship, physical assistance, and support for one another in body, soul and spirit.

Enable us to see that the longer we are married, the more we feel comfortable with one another, and we no longer feel the need to impress each other. We feel safe in the confidence that we are loved and cherished. We relax, breath easily and smile more often.

Remind us to enjoy one another’s company and to have fun together. Help us to understand each other, and to like, as well as love each other. Especially prompt us not to take one another for granted.

Thought for the Day:
When God gives us a mate to share our life with, we cherish, honor and protect one another for an entire lifetime. – Genesis 2:24

Identity Crisis

If a child does not receive the fulfillment of his/her legitimate human needs, they will look for people in their adulthood to meet them. Belonging, significance, acceptance, identity and security are the major psychological and emotional necessities in every human soul.

Our emotionally wounded parents were unable to provide these for us. As adults, we search in vain for our perfect soulmate, who has the limitless resources to make up for the deprivation from our past. In search of our fulfillment, we get too involved in earthly pursuits and change partners too often.

Those we reject suffer deep emotional scars, which are almost impossible to heal. As individuals, we attempt to perfect our personality and performance in order to find our personal worth through our human qualities, talents, intelligence, and physical assets.

The problem is that no one is capable of perfection. The key to our fulfillment on this earth is to realize that our true personal worth comes from our relationship with our supreme God and Father (Philippians 4:19). Only He provides us with a secure sense of belonging. We can trust Him and have no fear of His rejecting us for any reason.

If we cling to our deficiencies, rather than surrendering it all to God, we erect an idol, which we continue to “worship”. We allow Satan and our flesh to deceive us, which continues to cripple us. However, when we completely surrender all of our needs to God, He will meet them in His way and timing.

Prayer:
Father God, our freedom comes only as we surrender every aspect of our life to You. As long as we focus on what we lack, we continue to worship idols. Once we take our mind off our needs, and put it on worshipping and serving you, we suddenly discover that we are living a very fulfilling life. Remind us to commit our life to You, because then Jesus heals us and we are totally set free from emotional and psychological hindrances (John 8:32; Psalm 37:5). We enjoy mental, emotional and spiritual freedom, which only comes by learning to find our contentment in You (Philippians 4:11-13).

Thought for the Day:
In truth, complete fulfillment only comes when Christ is our whole life. – Colossians 3:4