Affirmation is so important to a human being. Belittling and verbally attacking each other may cause us to doubt our worth, to withdraw, to become bitter, and to stop meeting one another’s needs.
This affects our spiritual life, faith and vocation, as well as our emotional health. Words tear down or build up. Affirmation given in every possible circumstance, both in public and in private, will help to build up one another personally and as a couple.
Our self-worth is very fragile. Hearing negative words from our mate tears us down, belittles us, and makes us feel “less than”. We need to encourage and sustain each other throughout the day with texts, emails, phone calls and little notes tucked away in obvious places.
This decreases our mate’s intimacy and vulnerability sensitivity. We listen attentively and take an active interest in what interests one another. This lets us know that we are valued, cherished and desirable; and strengthens us to face the belittlement of the world around us.
Frequently communicating with each other the positive feelings that we have for one another endears us to our mate. We value, admire, and are proud of each other’s diligence as a couple, and in our family, life, vocation and church ministries.
We can agree to disagree rather than to argue; look for ways to compromise, rather than to insist on our own way; tell each other what we like about one another instead of pointing out faults or about what irritates us; and help each other when we get behind on our chores rather than to complain.
Father God, remind us to change our focus rather than to dwell on the negative aspects of our mate. Help us to see things from their perspective so we can understand their reactions to us and to life in general. Exhort us to see each other as a friend, not as a foe; and to treat each other as we expect to be treated.
Help us to pour out praise, compliments and appreciation to each other rather than criticism, sarcasm and finding faults. Teach us to cherish our relationship and one another, to love each other unconditionally as You love us, and to work together in a ministry that impacts our world for Your Kingdom.
Though for the Day:
Pointing out the good we see in our mate is a positive habit we can all cultivate – praise more and criticize less; find ways to compliment integrity, hard work, faithfulness, loyalty, selflessness, humility, diligence, and a job well done.